He hand me the chocolate flavoured ice-cream that he promised to buy me earlier. His, was a strawberry flavoured. Looked more cream-a-licious than mine. I took the ice-cream and just hold it in my hand. Dont feel like having ice-cream at that moment. He looked at me and frowned. "You dont like ice-cream, is that it? Or you dont like that flavour?" Oh! Now, I feel guilty. This good looking guy has been trying very hard to win my heart but I ...I just cant easily like him or adore him though he's awfully good looking. I cant just...arrgghh, I cant do this yet. "Ummm...the ice-cream's cool, chocolate my favourite, no mistake at all but you're just wasting your time Ed. I'm not good a company to go out with. I'll just bore you to death. You are just wasting your time Ed. Look at you, you have all the women staring and smiling at you. Why waste your time with someone like me. You should smile back at them, asked their number maybe or call that cuty girls you mentioned, Erin or Alyssa or Sara who has been waiting for you ever since. I have nothing that can entice or excites you. I really have nothing!" The ice-cream melt down on my hand. Eddie took the ice-cream and started licking saving it from melting totally. He wiped off my hand, fingers and looked deeply into my face. He gave me a chuckle. Pinched my cheek. "I say, you looked sooo cute with a face like that. Lets walk to that park." His finger pointing to the nearby park. He grab my hand and walked me towards the park. Its Monday afternoon, not many people at the park as its a working day and the office hours is still running. I, on the other hand have been having a bad day since morning and decided to just take half day off from work. I was walking aimlessly around the shopping mall nearby when I bumped into Eddie. He was delighted to see me and his face lit up when I lied that I am going for lunch. Uninvited, he volunteered to accompany me and at the same time buy me lunch. I just followed like a pet. Stupid of me. What was I thinking? His firm grip on my fingers made me feel secured. I've known Eddie for barely six months. He has been calling me since the day I met him at the cinema ticket counter. It was funny when I thought back. I planned to watch a show all alone and chose a romantic love story titled 'Letters to Juliet' but back off last minute after I have made it bravely to the ticket counter. The lady behind the counter asked me numerous time of how many ticket do I need. I just froze. Cant believe that I will be saying 'only one'. I have never watched movies or shows alone. I will always be accompanied and I have not been lucky with that word 'Always'. It will now changed to 'Never'. So it happened that this awfully gorgeous guy was standing behind me waiting for his turn. He was a little bit upset as I took quite a time to get my ticket and did not even thought that he would have shouted at me. His words were nothing actually. I would have not taken it personally on normal days as I dont buy any crappy words from someone I dont even know. But that day, I was really feeling lonely and his words were like hitting it more. I could not say a word but just stare at him hard. Silent tears rolled down my cheeks. I turned and ran towards the escalator and make my way out of the shopping mall. I then found a quiet corner and slowly come back to my senses. Little did I realised that the guy has been following me and now standing right behind me. I was shocked when he apologised but his gentle voice soothe my heart and immediately accepted his apology. I just explained that I was feeling lousy that day and apologised too for putting up a scene. In the end, we ended up having dinner together and decided to watch "Letters to Juliet' together. That was how I met Eddie. Eddie's a sweet guy. Girls would love to have him as boyfriend. How do I rate him? He has this Alex Pettyfer style(that hero in my favourite movie Beastly) a cute mole by the lips and the exact style of hair Alex Pettyfer has. The only best thing I cant resist about is his voice. That gentle, deep voice will melt you away. Pheww! enough of the praises. Thats for girls out there but not for me.
"Are
you holding anything against me Julia? I thought I have told you that you could
tell me anything, anything at all ya' know." Eddie sat on a small bench
and pulled me by his side. I have nothing to tell him. I have tried to open up
but could not find the right words to start with. How could I tell him about
how I lost my love, about how Dan went away and left me for good? I'm not ready
to share this with anyone. Not so soon. The smell of 'Aqua Di Gio' on Eddie
lingers nicely right through my heart. I love this scent of him whenever we are
alone together. "Listen, its been six months since we know each other. I'm
still waiting to know why you've cried when I first met you. I knew that it
must have been something very sensitive and bad that you prefer to just not talk
about it. If thinking of it make you feel awful then forget about it. I just
dont want you to hurt more. But at least try to forget it slowly. I know it
will be a bit too much if I asked you to do it for me coz' I'm nobody to you.
Do it for yourself then. For your future, maybe not with me but probably with
someone else better than me." He smiled. His intense eyes met mine. I love
to just gave him that look back. He smiled again. "Your eyes says
different thing about you. Brave, though mysterious but interesting not just
plain or dull." This time I pinched his cheek. He grabbed hold of my
fingers. " Please give me a chance Julia, I like you very much. That I
have told you earlier and since then, you have not open up to me. In fact,
you'd like ignoring me. I'm not good enough for you? or I'm no match with
whoever is that guy name who left you? Is that it?" Suddenly I felt like I
have hurt Eddie more than I thought. His hopes were too high on me. I still
love Dan and every single second of the day, reminds me of him. I wake up
thinking of him. Have lunch thinking of him and every single place I went to
reminds me of him. How do I erase him out of my mind? "I..I want to Eddie
but I just can't, I've tried and ended with hurting someone. I dont want to do
that. Not to you at least. Lets just remain as friends, that way, I will feel
more at ease." Eddie smiled again. He stand beside me and put his arms
around me. "Julia, I want to be with you, not as a friend. I want to be
able to do things for you. Make you happy and spend my whole life with you. I
want you to be mine. Filled my heart with whatever you have right now. Even if
its your sadness, I am ready to be there for you. The only way to start a new
is to open up and let others help you move forward. I am here to help you
Julia. You have trust in me?" I just shrugged. Dont even know whether I
could give anything in return to Eddie. "Okay, I will let you think while
I'm gone but once I am back, I want you to be mine!" I look up at him.
"You..going away? Where? Why didnt you tell me earlier? Umm..when are you
leaving?" Funny, suddenly I am panicked when Eddie's going away. That's
me! I am afraid to be left all alone. Traumatized by the things that happened
in the past.
"Hey
relax...I'm on training trip to London for 2 weeks and will be back before you
know it. For once I feel like you panicked if I'm going away for good too! I
wont okay and you dont have to worry, I will call you everyday from my
blackberry. You feel okay now and you said you dont feel anything for me?"
He pulled me closer and I just couldn't understand myself when I hugged him as
though I am going to lose him forever. He whispered in my ears that make my
heart leaped. I almost let out a giggle. "Why whats wrong? Is it too
soon?" Eddie's face looked annoyed. "Nope, nothing's wrong. Its good
to hear that word again after 2 years long. I'm sorry that I cant say that now
to you but I promise that I will give it a chance!" We walked home hand in
hand but Eddie will be gone in 2 days time and I have to gather all of myself
to a new life and hopefully to a new love.
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